There’s something about walking on a sidewalk with your rolling luggage, and a lady throwing a bunch of breadcrumbs in front of you, so that a flock of pigeons fly in the pathway that you plan on walking through ( aghhh… fucking pigeons!) that says – welcome to Seattle.
For a second I thought about going on the street and walking around the birds, but ended up being like…you know what? these are pigeons, and I am a human being and thus on top of nature’s food chain. I am going to walk through this horde of pigeons and if any one of them gets hurt…well… survival of the fittest. Maybe theyre not cut out for this world.
Seattle isnt as cold as I thought it would be. I was afraid that my thin desert adapted blood would go in crisis mode and wouldn’t know what to do, but thus far, I’m surviving. Plus, this colder weather makes it seem a little more like the holidays to me. Everywhere I look, people are coated in their marmot jackets and wrapped in infinity scarves, cupping their coffee like a lifeline. So many marmot jackets.
Yesterday, I rode in a friend’s Tesla. It was a car-ride full of so many questions. Is it okay that I bring my bubble tea in here? Is there wi-fi in this car? Can you google search stuff? Have you self-parked it before? Is that the speed gauge? It looks like heart monitor. So the car is going to turn off when you walk away? I know some people are like yea, whatever- it’s just a Tesla. Be cool, Winter. Be coo. I probably sounded like an ignorant small-townie… which I am when it comes to that sort of stuff, but having never been in anything so techy, and being tech challenged, I was impressed. It felt like I had so much responsibility just by being in the car, like I shouldn’t adjust my weight to one side lest the windows might roll down.
Anyways, I finally saw my dad yesterday. He had a feeding tube down his nose and at first kind of just looked at me. I asked him a bunch of questions – hows it going dad. (nod) you doing okay (nod). Is that thing up your nose okay (nod) you want to look at pictures (nod)
It was a cycle of me asking him questions and him nodding and being unexpressive. I don’t know if he was just nodding because that’s all he could do, but I ended up playing him some music, some old Filipino songs that he would karaoke to when I was kid. As I sat on the floor next to his bed (there was a plug at his bed, and my phone was at 2% and needed charging) his hand began tapping to the music and then tapped my head, then touch my face. It was a touch that lingered for a while.
I had wondered what would be the moment when I would start crying, and for sure thought that it would be when I walked into his room and saw him lying in his hospital bed. But, it was this moment when the music that I didn’t understand the lyrics to was playing and his hand lingered on my face ( like I was the one needing comforting in this situation) that flooded me with memories of me being a kid again, tearing down whatever wall I was trying to keep up.
I know, so emotional. Aghh. I’m trying no to look sad at the coffee shop that I’m at and trying to remind myself not to make a scene since I’m in public. I kind of made eye contact with a guy with a black eye. I was just staring into space and somehow, fate locked our eyes and I was like.. oh shit, look away. don’t stare.
Things that I like:
The Punisher. Probably the best of netflix marvel series that they have out there. Seriously, Shane (I don’t know his real name so I call him Shane from Walking Dead) does such a good job in that role.
Seattle City Christmas Lights : Like I said, it feels a lot like the holidays here because of the weather, but also – they light the city up with Christmas lights a little more
Urban Decay Ultimate Basics – I have so many eye shadow pallets, but I recently got this, and it’s such a versatile basic pallet. If that makes sense. Right now, my new go-to.
Fenty Beauty Foundation – I was trying out makeup at Sephora the other day. I’m usually pretty careful when it comes to make-up, especially when celebrities are attached to it. But omg. This product goes on light, but when sets into your skin has completely full coverage. I even put a darker shade on my had first, then tried a lighter shade and that completely covered the darker shade. The line comes in a wide spectrum of shades. Highly recommend.
Anyways, that’s all I can think of right now. Until next time…