Entry 70 : That’s Like… Somebody’s Daughter

Husband and I were at this restaurant bar in the University, people watching the people across the street, when we saw a group of females go into this bar with bikini tops and short as short shorts.

The more we watched, the more we saw college girls scantily clad, along with bros in douche tanks entering the establishment.

What is going on? I thought, while I stuffed french fries in my mouth. I never was a person confident enough to wear bikini tops out in anywhere other than a beach, so this was interesting to me. Is this what kids nowadays wear when they go out?

And then my next thoughts…

…. That’s like… somebody’s daughter. I wonder if her daddy knows ….

I know, I shouldn’t judge. I too had a period of time where I partied and had slutty nights out. My dad would sometimes ask me where I was going and I would name off specific friends that I knew he liked who were (maybe) going to be there.

“Jane”, “Betty”, and “Sally”…You know “Sally” ! She’s lives down the street…

And before he could protest… Gotta go. BYEEEE!

At some point, I got old. I think it started when my friends started having kids, and I started becoming a Godparent and forming affections towards them… I don’t want to see any of them grow up!

But it’s inevitable. Kids grow up, and before you know it… they’re off to college, majoring in Social Justice Warrior, and wearing bikini tops on the daily. But even if they don’t…they’re going to be in a crazy/arguably crazier world than the one that already exists.

I don’t have kids, but I know it’s probably the toughest job to raise a child so they dont end up becoming horrible adults, but instead becoming decent human beings with good morals and values, and individuals who are able to face the crazines and not fall down. Because craziness does and will exist. So props to the parents out there doing the right thing. If the time ever comes for me, I will probably be asking you a plethora of questions… including Why does my child keep drawing boxes with their eyes?!?

Things I like this week

NYX Glow StickI bought this on the whim since Ulta gives you $3.50 off for spending $15, but this has been my glow stick since I bought it. It’s super quick if you want to get your glow, but only have 5 seconds to swipe on your face and blend. Possibly Best Drug Store Brand of glow stick I’ve tried?

Heart Defensor Elf Highlighter So Heart Defensor is one of the beauty gurus I follow on YouTube and she collaborated with Elf Cosmetics with this highlighter. I would say the packaging is really cute, although fingerprints go on quite easily. but the highlighter is …okay? . Maybe if I hadn’t gotten the NYX glow stick, I would like it more…

Costco Beauty Online – Costco.com doesn’t have a lot of beauty products, but I like to check it from time to time to see what they have. Occasionally, they have really good deals on products that I love. One time I bought Mac Strobe cream there for $20 (I think normally it’s $30. They had Laura Mercier’s Translucent Powder another time for half the price it normally retails. Now, they have Tarte Amazonian Clay Palette for like $30ish when normally it’s like $54, and some other good skin care brands like Tatcha, and Clinique. So if you’re a Costco member, I definitely recommend going on Costco.com and checking out their skincare/beauty stuff from time to time to see what they got.

Anyways, that’s all for now. I hope everyone has a great rest of your week!

Until next time…

Entry 70 : That’s Like… Somebody’s Daughter

Entry 64: Of Love and Ash

Forewarning, this entry is a bit religious… because it’s Ash Wednesday and kind of a big deal for Catholics/Christians who see this as the beginning of a month and a half of spiritual prep for Easter.

It’s also Valentines day.

You better believe I got my ashes on this morning…and then later tonight when husband gets home, I’m going to give him a DIY card, sushi, and Jack Daniels fudge, and then we’re going to have a dance party. ūüėČ

Many Catholics have probably already contemplated the coincidence of Ash Wednesday and Valentines falling on the same day. Or maybe they haven’t and I could be the only one. It seems befitting that these two holidays should be one in the same day. True, dwelling on Jesus’ death for a month a half can kind of be depressing, and combined with the infusion of a few more Catholic rules of what you can and cannot eat and do, I can understand why people might gloss over Lent in general and skip to coloring eggs and taking pictures with the Easter bunny.

But to me, Jesus’ death is the ultimate act of love, even more so than that $10-$20 box of chocolates and my DIY card; Lent is just a reminder of that love.

This reminder couldn’t have come at a better time for me. These past few days I’ve been doing a lot of self-contemplation and reflection, looking at myself in the bareness of my vulnerabilities and (if I can be honest) I’ve been kind of lost and wandering aimlessly trying to find out who I am and what I should be doing with my life in order to find some purpose or meaning. Sure, I get that life happens and often changes what plans you had for yourself 10 years ago, but thinking about all this has brought me face to face with the following truth: I have not cared for myself as well as I should.

Maybe you’re surprised that this is the case (which means I’m really good at creating a facade). Or maybe it’s something you could have told me based on the fact that I have really bad posture, but it’s a mental block that I’ve struggled to find a way out of since I was kid and which I’m starting to realize the negatives effects of. It’s the voice that has continually told myself I cant, or that something wasn’t worth trying because I wasn’t worth the chance of failing. It is the thing that has ultimately brought me to this state of limbo.

I know, these are super depressing realizations, and you’re probably like you’re so valuable and have so much potential, you don’t even know. I have had many people tell me this on many occassion, it’s just that when a negative mentality has been so engrained for so long, it becomes the truth you believe, and sometimes the truth you believe makes all the difference, not what people tell you.

But like I said, that’s where the combo of Lent and Valentine’s seemingly has its perfect timing: to break through that stupid mental limbo wall of low self-opinion and remind me that despite whatever thoughts or feelings or sinfulness I might have, I am worth it, because why else would Jesus have died?

Anyways, I hope everyone has a blessed Ash Wednesday and Valentine’s day, and day in general. I’m still trying to figure out what to give up, but my priest did shed some light on the fact that it should be personal and we shouldn’t just go through the motions. In whatever we give up, should wake up hungry, go through the day hungry, and go to bed even more hungry for Jesus.

Until next time….

Entry 64: Of Love and Ash

Entry 55: Shots for Eeerbody!

This morning I was watching some highlights of the National Championship game (I fell asleep after half time) and at the end, the Freshmen QB from Hawaii who was put in during the second half,  was interviewed after his game winning TD.

The interviewer asked him a question about what was going through his mind after finding out he was going to play in the National Championship, and he was like¬†My parents are going to get mad but…¬†and then proceeds to thank God.

You can imagine how that made my little Catholic heart feel: in the midst of arguably being the hero in a championship game, in the most selflessly poised way possible… gives props to Jesus,¬†and then gives props to his teammates.

Knowing me, I would be like..OMG! I won! OMGeeeee!!  Shots for eeerr body!!! aaaaahhh!!!! and probably be jumping up and down uncontrollably, looking for a champagne bottle to pop.

But what a great kid.¬† He must have some parents to raise a kid that doesn’t want to get them mad while on national tv. Most kids would be like…¬†shit, I’m 18, I do what I want! I say what I want… biotch!

There’s so much stuff going on in the world that raising children in the midst of it seems daunting, but the world needs good parents who raise good kids. It’s a bigger responsibility than anyone thinks of when they think they want kids, that beyond feeding them and wiping their butts, you have a responsibility to society to not create shit human beings.

But that’s why I give kuddos to all the parents out there laying good foundations, teaching their kids morals and values, the difference between right and wrong, the importance of hard work, and all the other little things I may be missing. I can only hope that when the time comes, if we’re so blessed, we’ll be able to do the same to where if someone saw our kid, they’d be like¬†wow, that’s a great a kid.¬†

Things I like this week

Tarte Shape Tape Concealor: I know I’m late to this Shape Tape craze, but this is quite possibly the best concealer I’ve tried, ever.¬† Actually, I’m usually like, yea whatever it’s just a concealer that’s supposed to highlight and maybe hide spots… but this one has set the standard of what I need in my life. It easily covered up veins on my wrist with one swatch. Highly recommend for a full coverage concealor

“You Look Good” – Lady Antebellum – Ever since husband got a truck, we’ve been listening to country. At first it was a joke, because listening to country is such the stereotypical thing to do when you get a truck. But then I actually started liking it, and now I listen to country music 75% of the time. It’s a complete 180 from the hiphop/r&b/pop I would saturate my ears with, but a lot of country is actually really good; it gets stuck in your head, and you start humming it,¬† then you realize – holy shit, is a good song.

Anyways, this is my song when I get ready in the morning or when I work out, running, doing butt exercises, etc etc…¬† It’s my confidence booster, and you know what they say…¬† confidence is the key to looking/being a boss.

Glad the Holidays Are Over –¬†I finally took down my Christmas decor the other day.¬† I love Christmas and everything, but am also glad when things can finally go back to a routine. Only 11 more months til Christmas. lol

The Marvelous Mrs Maisel The first episode started off kind of slow, but I decided to give this another try since it did earn a few awards.¬† The main character in the show played an escort in House of Cards. For whatever reason, I can’t get that out of my head while I’m watching the show, but it’s good.

Anyways, I hope everyone has an amazing week. It’s 80 in the desert. I know, everyone who doesn’t live in sunny weather probably hates me. Or not. I don’t know. But if you do and if it makes you feel better, my eyes are really dry because of the weather.

Until next time.

Entry 55: Shots for Eeerbody!

Entry 54: Goodbye 2017, Hello 2018

How about them 2017 Goals ?!?

Were you like me and completely forgot about them, or gave up on them after week 2? I don’t even remember the specifics of my 2017 goals. Probably something a long the lines of writing my epic novella, being serious about photography, or finding some other calling that made my creative heart leap with joy.

Obviously, that didn’t happen.

As 2017 has drawn to a close, I reflect over what happened with last year’s goals, One thing is I can honestly say is that I didn’t even really try. Sure, I took a picture here and there, sat at a Starbucks to attempt to write, but I didn’t seriously try – like my life depended on it, because it didn’t.

That’s the thing about goals, if it’s not a dire situation, then you don’t necessarily have to do them. We may want the end result of a goal, but consistently facing the challenges to achieve it is the difficult part. So as I’m thinking about last years goals, and thinking about this years goals – I ask myself do I really want it? Like really want these goals, like I wanted Fenty beauty foundation after finding that my color wasn’t at the Bellevue Square Sephora? I went out of my way to 3 other Sephoras to get the color I needed. I realize now that I could’ve just bought it online and waited.

With my goals this year, I am going to change this whole attitude of¬†well, I don’t really have to do this so…¬†because yea, I don’t have to, but no one makes progress by just thinking about how nice it be to make a goal or being too afraid of taking risks; progress is made by doing and just diving in. That’s the attitude I’m going to take with this year. Wish me luck.

Things I like this week:

American Vandal :¬†If you like crime investigation shows like /¬†podcasts like Serial or crime, and also have a sense of humor, you’ll like this show. The show is a spoof that revolves around the investigation of¬†who spraypainted dicks on the teacher’s cars?¬† Highly recommend.

Bright :¬†This is the new netflix movie with Will Smith. I was hesitant about watching this as there were a lot of negative reviews, but I watched it, and it wasn’t the best movie, but it wasn’t that bad, but maybe it wasn’t that bad because I expected it to be horrible. Like Twighlight.

Green Tea Mochi – I finally made my green tea mochi for New Years. Last time I made this cake I added too much matcha, because I was like..¬†why not?¬†but it ended up disgusting. This time, I did the correct consistency, and it was legit. I’m sure there’s a million green tea mochi recipes out there, but this one seemed to work. Plus, this blogger has other times of mochi cake recipes, like chocolate, and blueberry, and bacon maple mochi cake…¬† mmmm….mochi

Anyways, I hope everyone had a fun and safe New or Years. I was skeptical over whether or not I would make it til midnight, but I did it. I actually stayed up til 1 am ūüôā I’m still fun

Until next time…


Entry 54: Goodbye 2017, Hello 2018

Entry 51: Hello, Seattle.

There’s something about walking on a sidewalk with your rolling luggage, and a lady throwing a bunch of breadcrumbs  in front of you, so that a flock of pigeons fly in the pathway that you plan on walking through ( aghhh… fucking pigeons!) that says – welcome to Seattle.

For a second I thought about going on the street and walking around the birds, but ended up being like…you know what? these are pigeons, and I am a human being and thus on top of nature’s food chain. I am going to walk through this horde of pigeons and if any one of them gets hurt…well… survival of the fittest. Maybe theyre not cut out for this world.

Seattle isnt as cold as I thought it would be. I was afraid that my thin desert adapted blood would go in crisis mode and wouldn’t know what to do, but thus far, I’m surviving. Plus, this colder weather makes it seem a little more like the holidays to me. Everywhere I look, people are coated in their marmot jackets and wrapped in infinity scarves, cupping their coffee like a lifeline. So many marmot jackets.

Yesterday, I rode in a friend’s Tesla. It was a car-ride full of so many questions. Is it okay that I bring my bubble tea in here? Is there wi-fi in this car? Can you google  search stuff? Have you self-parked it before? Is that the speed gauge?  It looks like heart monitor. So the car is going to turn off when you walk away?  I know some people are like yea, whatever- it’s just a Tesla. Be cool, Winter. Be coo.  I probably sounded like an ignorant small-townie… which I am when it comes to that sort of stuff, but having never been in anything so techy, and being tech challenged, I was impressed. It felt like I had so much responsibility just by being in the car, like I shouldn’t adjust my weight to one side lest the windows might roll down.

Anyways, I finally saw my dad yesterday. He had a feeding tube down his nose and at first kind of just looked at me. I asked him a bunch of questions – hows it going dad. (nod) you doing okay (nod). Is that thing up your nose okay (nod) you want to look at pictures (nod) 

It was a cycle of me asking him questions and him nodding and being unexpressive. I don’t know if he was just nodding because that’s all he could do, but I ended up playing him some music, some old Filipino songs that he would karaoke to when I was kid.  As I sat on the floor next to his bed (there was a plug at his bed, and my phone was at 2% and needed charging) his hand began tapping to the music and then tapped my head, then touch my face. It was a touch that lingered for a while.

I had wondered what would be the moment when I would start crying, and for sure thought that it would be when I walked into his room and saw him lying in his hospital bed. But, it was this moment when the music that I didn’t understand the lyrics to was playing and his hand lingered on my face ( like I was the one needing comforting in this situation) that  flooded me with memories of me being a kid again, tearing down whatever wall I was trying to keep up.

I know, so emotional. Aghh. I’m trying no to look sad at the coffee shop that I’m at and trying to remind myself not to make a scene since I’m in public. I kind of made eye contact with a guy with a black eye. I was just staring into space and somehow, fate locked our eyes and I was like.. oh shit, look away. don’t stare.

Things that I like:

The Punisher. Probably the best of netflix marvel series that they have out there. Seriously, Shane (I don’t know his real name so I call him Shane from Walking Dead) does such a good job in that role.

Seattle City Christmas Lights : Like I said, it feels a lot like the holidays here because of the weather, but also – they light the city up with Christmas lights a little more

Urban Decay Ultimate Basics  I have so many eye shadow pallets, but I recently got this, and it’s such a versatile basic pallet. If that makes sense.  Right now, my new go-to.

Fenty Beauty Foundation – I was trying out makeup at Sephora the other day. I’m usually pretty careful when it comes to make-up, especially when celebrities are attached to it.  But omg. This product goes on light, but when sets into your skin has completely full coverage. I even put a darker shade on my had first, then tried a lighter shade and that completely covered the darker shade. The line comes in a wide spectrum of shades.  Highly recommend.

Anyways, that’s all I can think of right now.  Until next time…

Entry 51: Hello, Seattle.

Entry 45: Living in a Depressing World

When I woke up Monday morning, my heart wrenched as I saw the news about the Las Vegas shooting . A lot of us have Рat some point Рbeen to Vegas, walked the same streets (probably a little drunk or with a drink at hand. Shoot, I know I was)  been to the Mandalay Bay, and are now having those of thoughts of holy shit РI could have been there. I could have experienced that. 

Thankfully, we are safe. Me writing this little blurb, and you reading this or other articles, and watching the news with your hand over your heart while hugging your little ones, (or in my case my dogs ). All the while trying to process, What the fuck is wrong with this world. 

The thought comes up every time some sort of tragedy strikes. We become sad and upset and find ourselves wondering why these sort of things happen in life . The sad truth of it all is, it seems as if it has been happening more and more often.  One after the other, after the other,  leaving us with the inability to just focus on one thing. Or even have a breather.

It was earlier this year that there was that attack in Manchester during the Ariana Grande concert, and I remember feeling the same way as I do now. Yet with all the crap happening Рthe other attacks in London,  Black Lives Matter movements,  Antifa protests, natural disasters, the NFL, and now this РManchester seems like a long time ago.

I will say that there are a few things that annoy me when these types of events happen

  1. stupid people rationalizing that it’s God’s way of getting rid of certain people, or hoping that it did: ¬†in the case of Harvey, Irma, and the mass shooting – the “Trumptards”. I’m sorry, that’s a horrible thought.
  2. Politicians who immediately see these events as a way of furthering their agenda within hours of the event. I agree gun control is a thing that needs to be addressed, but can you give it at least 48 hours so we can process, and pray, and make sure all the victims and injured people are okay?

It’s depressing that this is the world we live in, and even more depressing to think of our future growing up in a world that is seemingly getting worse. But I think it’s important to remember that while these evils do exists, there is still good in the world. You don’t have to look very hard or very far to find it. It is times like these where good has the opportunity to shine, ¬†where political and religious walls can be brought down to unite one human being to another, and where we as indiviudals can be reminded to fight the evils that do exist by being the best human beings we can be and instilling the same values upon our children to do the same.

That probably sounded cheesy or preachy.. or whatever, but I don’t know… this is kind of a big thing that just happened. ¬†Hopefully I have something light-hearted to talk about next time… like how Husband is sick .. which is not light-hearted, but the fact that I’m suggesting Filipino remedies is. Stinky Asian Filipino oil (Husband –¬†No).¬†Let me put Vicks up your nose (no) . Let me put Vicks on your Feet (no) .

Anyways, until next time…





Entry 45: Living in a Depressing World

Entry 43: Becoming Older… and Apparently More Parent-y

Every Sunday for me and my family is Football Sunday. And when it’s not football season, it’s Walking Dead Sunday, and then Game of Thrones Sunday. And if neither of those shows are on, me and husband look at each and are like, none of the shows we like are on… what do you want to do?¬†At which point, we filter through HBO, Prime, or Netflix, and if nothing on those services appeal to our interest, we watch Big Bang Theory.

Luckily, we have not faced that roadblock since it is football season. This past Sunday night football, we had a few friends over, and extended the invitation to a few friends of a friend.

At the end of the night, one of the extended friends, who is 23 years old, was like¬†you guys don’t have any kids? (A :¬†Uhm, I think you would’ve seen them if we did) ..oh… cuz you guys are like.. parent-y.

I don’t think he meant it in a negative way, or at least I certainly didn’t take it that way. The only reasons I can think of why he said it was maybe because a. we’re a whole decade older than him or b. we’re good hosts and fed him.

Whatever the reason, in my head – I was like,¬†parent-y? when did that happen?¬†Especially since I myself don’t think I have the maturity of a parent, let alone an adult. Maybe if I showed him my adult coloring book collection, or the hello kitty socks that I have in my drawer, he would think otherwise.

Or not.

Earlier that evening, a commercial came on for The Voice.

23 year old : ¬†I don’t even know who the black chick is.

Me: That’s Jennifer Hudson… she was on American Idle

::Blank stare::

I have accepted that this will happen more and more the older that I get: having to explain pop culture and events of yesteryear that will be met with blank stares. I am anticipating that the day when I have to explain who NSync and the BackStreet Boys are will come fairly soon. It will be a day that will hurt my heart, but one which I will gladly take the time to explain the cultural phenom that was.

It makes me think about how my teachers in high school tried to explain world events that they lived through – like the Berlin Wall coming down. Or how my mom’s face would light up whenever she saw Donny Osmond on tv , and how I myself met them with stares of¬†yea, I know you’ve lived through this, and I can see you feel a certain way, but I can’t exactly share your emotion.¬†

Ehh, it is what it is. It’s all a part of getting older… and becoming parent-y .. I suppose.

Until next time…


Entry 43: Becoming Older… and Apparently More Parent-y